Your french humour for the day

I happened upon a very amusing article from a blog today entitled "20 phrases never to say to your wife when you get home from work." (I am particularly fond of #3) From the blog "Maman Travaille" (Working Mom), here is a look inside the french mind;

You have your little habits , go , talk, throw general truths or just chat . But do you know that among all that you say, you are certain phrases lose 10 points from coast to return the love and conjugal duty next month ? Here are 20 sentences to never tell your wife home from work ... or elsewhere.
1. I have a new intern ... She is fresh , funny , cool: looks like you ten years ago ! Besides, she was born in 1992 . Funny no?
2 . Oh no thank you , it's cute to have taken a osso bucco for tonight but was sprayed on the departure of Jean - Mi, I drank like ten whiskey I can not swallow anything .
3. My colleague had brought a chocolate mousse , hmm , the best I've ever eaten in my life! Uh ... yes yes , take apart the course ...
4. I 'm beat. You can not understand me, stress the responsibilities ...

5 . You could have folded the laundry anyway ! It is a ball
6. I get out , I 'll see a game ... Our what? anniversary ? Uh ... we will celebrate tomorrow ?
7 . Have not you grown a bit in recent time?
8. At noon I had lunch with Marie - Christine . In head - to-head .
9 . Pasta, yet ?
10 . Why children are not lying ? It 's late! I have not the strength to take care
11 . Why do children lie ? It is early! I wanted to see
12. Oh no , you have taken Heineken , yet you know that my friends drink Grimbergen . Sigh ...
13 . I do not ask you how was your day , it could not be worse than mine.
14 . Hmm? No I was not listening , sorry darling but you know me, stories about girls ... (When you were talking about your new big customer )
15. This afternoon I asked the team in a great restaurant , so this week we'll go easy on spending.
16. Oh unusually late tomorrow I'll finish . Like today and yesterday. And last week .
17. I travel all because my colleagues , the poor , have young children ages. How? I too have the two babies ? Yes but I am a man, it's different ...
18 . I resigned
19 . I accepted a position at Tulsa . Happy?
20 . What's for dinner?